Galluccio - In The News

THE RECORD

GAY PARENTS FORMALIZING THE FAMILY
Tuesday, April 28, 1998

By RUTH PADAWER
Staff Writer

This year, Father's Day will have an added twist for Jon and Michael Galluccio, the gay couple from Maywood who recently sued the state of New Jersey and won the right to jointly adopt their foster son.

Not only will they celebrate their parenting of 2 1/2-year-old Adam, but on that day, they will also go before their minister, family, and friends and be wed -- at least in the eyes of the church.

"We want to stand at the altar before the people of God and have our union recognized, and blessed," said Jon Holden Galluccio, who legally took his partner's surname this month, on their 16th anniversary as a couple.

Moments later, in a hallway of the Bergen County Courthouse, in front of passers-by, the courthouse guard, and the candy vendor, Holden Galluccio dropped to one knee and proposed.

It is not the first time the couple's private lives have been before the public. In June, they led a class-action lawsuit challenging the state's policy of precluding gays from adopting jointly. It spurred a hail of media coverage and a growing list of well-wishers. Even strangers wrote letters of support, moved by the way the men had taken in Adam 1 1/2 years earlier, as an underweight, drug-addicted infant, and nursed him to robust health.

The trappings of fame have been dizzying: a literary agent, a movie deal, speaking engagements at colleges and churches, even a Web site. In February, the couple started a two-page newsletter to answer all the calls and letters asking for updates on the family. Already, there are 485 addresses on the mailing list. The engagement will be announced in the next edition of the newsletter. Television reporters have begun inquiring about whether they can film the ceremony.

Six years ago, the two men -- then non-practicing Catholics -- held a secular "commitment ceremony" in the Rockland County countryside, reading vows and celebrating in tuxedos with friends. In the years since, they have become active in the Episcopal Church, drawn by the way Bishop John Shelby Spong of Newark has led a campaign to open the faith to lesbians and gays.

"Religion has played a significant role in our battle and in our victory," Holden Galluccio said. "The way our church embraced us, along with our own spirituality, helped us know that it was worth fighting for, that we were on the right road."

Marriage between homosexuals is not legally recognized anywhere in the United States, however.

In December, the state agreed to allow gay couples and unmarried heterosexual couples to jointly adopt, making New Jersey the first state in the nation to determine that sexual orientation is irrelevant to parenting skill. The men also hope to adopt a baby girl who has been in their foster care for the last 14 months.

The two plan a private ceremony for Saturday, June 20, and a public one at the Episcopal Church of the Atonement in Fair Lawn the next day. The timing is full of symbolic significance: Not only is it a year and two days after they filed for Adam's adoption, but the ceremonies fall in the middle of Gay Pride Month.

And of course, that Sunday is Father's Day, which for Michael has double meaning. At the last commitment ceremony, his parents refused to show up because his father was so distressed by Michael's homosexuality. After years of struggling through their fears and discomfort, his parents this time have relented.

"If Michael wants me there, I'll be there," said Adolph Galluccio, a prominent criminal defense attorney in Paterson. "I've got mixed feelings at times, but the bottom line is, I love my son and I'm proud of him and I don't ever want to turn my back on him."